Well...it seems that my blog causes more problems for me than need be...for really. I mean right now I should be working on back assignment, doing something for Geo, re-writing the proofs that I just learned [but don't understand at all], and what not. Plus on top of that I got a 201/400 on my test...you don't have to do the math...I'll tell you what that is: a freaking 52%. yeah...I know that I should be all pissed off and stuff...but I know it is my fault for not doing anything about it in the longest time...so in a way I'm over the fact that I'm failing a class that is going to get me in to college...hell right now I really don't want to go anyway...I really don't. I mean come on...I really don't want to go...because I'm going to have all kinds of freaking problems...oh geez...yeah my mood swings are kicking in and it is driving me nuts...I mean I just dunno. I really don't. Some crazy lady [Social Service Lady] came over last night to investigate the premises...oh freaking well...I mean did she not see that I sleep on a freaking couch?? I mean come on lady...you walk into the freaking house and you see my bed? How fricked up is that?? I mean come on? I dunno though...I really don't...I mean yeah...I guess I'm doing a lot better off...but I can't help but think that I could be somewhere else...where I have a bed and a room...and ALL my clothes and my CDs and a CLOSET...I mean come on?? I just can't imagine all of this going down like this...I have to call my Grandpa tonight because he has to take me to Platteville this weekend for my craptacular Placement Testing...which I hope to score all remidial classes so I can be the smartest stupid kid around...but for really. I was thinking about this last night and if I really did try I would be tons better off...I mean instead I just decide to do nothing and pretend that everything will be all right...because in my little world....everything is always all right...nothing every goes wrong...in my world...everything would be great...but I'm not in my world...I'm in the world of fuckedup-ness...and let me tell you it blows...everything about this world blows and it sucks...and I hate living in this world...I mean yeah...I live in America...but I'm still 17 and I haven't got to exericise my right of diddly...so yeah...it sucks here...I mean I'm glad I don't live in a place like Iraq or anything...but this place sucks...I mean we are all so closed minded and there is nothing here that is so great for us...I mean I wish for a second I could see what I would be like back at Riverdale...yeah I know that I would be a high school drop out and that I'd have a kid and what not...and maybe that would be just the thing for me...but you never really know...and I would really want to know...on to more horrible subjects: such as...you know...well yeah...there are all kinds of nice things I could say...but I'm not...besides the fact that my mouth got me all messed up and now there is nothing that I can do to stop the fact...that nothing will come of this...which is almost fine with me...I mean come on...but yeah...tossing him to the wayside...next...oh...and Stefan...yeah don't want to see him at all...well I just don't...that is of course unless he has chocolate...and that is the only time that I will have anything to do with him...for really...because...well you know...there is nothing I like more than having some kind of food to eat...but yes...maybe I should go and attempt something called Homework...instead of doing nothing and playing in my online world of crap...because let's face it...this really isn't anything...and it is just a time consumer...that really doesn't help at all...which really blows...and what not...I mean I just can't help but think about everything and what not....and my life sucks...I mean I rather have a little online thingy than anything else...I mean I can't even write what I feel on a freaking piece of paper...no I have to wait to type it all up and then publish it all over the freaking internet...yeah...that's cool...and then on top of that...while I'm school I have this need for attention and what not...a craving to get something I need...well...I mean that is just horrible. I hope no one reads this...and if you do...oh well...but I must say that I should prolly be going to do something...even if it is just reading a magazine...my last comment...I love my feet and I hate wearing Shoes.