I dunno...just thinking...I'm really sorry to say this: but I'm hella happy we didn't go. I just don't think that was going to be good for me. I've had some things in my life that have scared me to death. I mean...I don't really want to go into detail cuz it scares me...but drinking doesn't appeal to me. In any way. I mean honestly. I have this issue and I'm scared that some guy will take advangtage of me. It is just one of those things. I dunno...like the vibe I get from drunk people is sometimes really scary. You know? Like it just...you can't tell what they are going to do.

On a lighter note [i was depressing myself]. Ashley said we have something. Not Ashley and me...but you know...him and me. I'm pretty sure you know who/what/thing I'm talking about. yeah...I just feel it you know. I hope I don't scare him away with my scary ways...that would be hella scary. Cuz like he's great. I just can't stop thinking bout him...he is just great. Superb. <----And that is what it feels like to be in love.